Listening, learnng and loving it.

These last few days I've had to take it easy. My knees and body were telling me that I needed to rest. I continued to work out, but instead of pushing myself - I practiced listening to my body. I said no to a few classes that I would have done - not because I needed to but purely because I was there.

By doing this, I discovered that my ego was in the driver seat and was fixated on keeping up with my work out partner. We were running neck in neck into the weekend - but he pulled ahead over the weekend. My ego did not like this and found that I was beating myself up for not winning the competition. I admit - I like to win and if I have to lose, I want it to be a good fight. I will push myself to achieve success. I have done this at work for years - and was a little surprised to see that I am doing the same here.

I mentioned this to Rebecca today in our creative / expressive movement class and she encouraged me to use it in my dance. It was enlightening to play with this in my dance today and helped me to put it in a more positive light. I am really enjoying these classes and will certainly look to take up dance again when I return home or incorporate it into my weekly physical activities.

Our NIA classes have taken on a life of it's own. The gym was full of eager participants - all of the regulars were there -but we had an influx of new people as well. Apparently, they skipped out of the planned lectures to come to our NIA class! It's such a great way to start the day - I've ordered a couple of DVD's and the NIA technique book so I can do it when I get home. Plus if I'm going to go for my white belt - I will need to practice!

Now that I'm in week 5 I don't have to go to all of the lectures - I am enjoying this part. The lectures are good and very informational. I learnt a lot but am really wanting to put things into practice. I have adjusted to planning a week's worth a meals in advance and noting all that I eat. I can see the value of it - but the expressive in me ..finds it little tedious. As I picked up Menu D ... I couldn't help but sigh. It was much easier this time as I am now familiar with all of the selections. I am also getting really good at knowing the number of calories that certain foods have - and it's much easier to swap things around. There were some days where I swapped every item on the menu ...and only 2 meals were I accepted all items offered. I have no doubt that I will achieve mastery by the time I am ready to leave in a few weeks. That's when the true test will start!

Well folks - it's late and my body is saying that I should have been in bed an hour ago ....so sweet dreams from me to you!

Lots of love,

Norma

A fresh start!

As predicted the scale did reflect yesterday's escapade. I did find this morning that I felt very sluggish, so much so that after breakfast, I went back to bed for few hours. I'm glad I did as I felt a lot better and was ready for my afternoon of classes.

First up was my one-2-one creative movement class with Rebecca. She came armed with fresh music this week and once again it was a really uplifting experience. She had two options for me to work with - the first one caught me by surprises. It brought tears to my eyes as it was "I Hope You Dance" by Lee Ann Womack. There was a small book with the lyrics written as a story and the CD was enclosed. I picked up for Katrine when we were together in Kentucky - as they spoke to me then and again today. I liked the second piece as well - but opted for "I Hope You Dance". Rebecca suggested that this be a piece that I could create a dance to share with Katrine - I liked the idea - and will share this with her in September :-)

I followed this with a Dance Fusion class and ended the day with a Gyrokinesis class. Both were great. Dance Fusion was a little challenging at times but it's such a great cardio class - we were all sweating up a storm and turned on the fans towards the end of the class.

I really enjoy Gyrokinesis - as I find it allows me to focus on stretching / awakening various body parts and it's just a great way to end the day.

That's it for now!

Love to all,

Norma

Roadblocks

I have been sailing along and having a great time - I was thrilled on Friday to see that I had hit the 20 lb mark ...I had a really great expressive movement class with Rebecca - NIA was cancelled as Kate injured herself gardening and needs to take a few days off.

So how is it that I am now experiencing a roadblock? Perhaps it's because it's a holiday weekend here in the US as well as in Bermuda. It's also Nita's birthday, Butch & Ally's wedding and XL's Global Day of Giving. I am enjoying this time for myself -but really felt like I was missing out on things. Seeing pictures of my team's efforts for the Global Day of Giving and the wedding - was wonderful -and I found myself getting a little teary eyed.

As I looked around me ... it wasn't quite the same. On Friday evening I opted to sign up to take the shuttle to the movies (it's a weekly event here at Structure House) and saw the new Indiana Jones movie ...have to admit I was really disappointed with it - the first one remains the best in my opinion. I had a small popcorn as planned - but decided that I would also have some chocolate with it - I opted for raisinettes - raisins are on the menu here ...so figured it would be better than any of the other varieties. I know ... my feeble attempt to justify my choice.

As to be expected the treat showed up on the scale - I noted it in the diary - and was back on track on Saturday. I did just over an hour on the treadmill as well as a full strength training session with Randy. My knees have been bothering me a bit - so opted to not exercise today - figuring that my body would enjoy the rest.

Although I've been doing well, I found this weekend to be challenging. I found myself craving some away time and really needing a break away from here. I've been contemplating renting a car - and decided to rent a car for the next 3 weeks. I don't anticipate driving it daily - but want to have the freedom to get out and about.

The car rental company was closing early because it's Memorial Day Weekend - and didn't have a compact available - so upgraded me (at no additional cost) to a larger car. It feels like a tank - so will swap it on Tuesday. I was a little apprehensive at first but soon adjusted to the extra dimension and went exploring this afternoon. All in all, I had a good time - and returned feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the week ahead.

For those of us that have been there for a month - we've had a lot of discussions at meal times on foods that we haven't had for a while and what we've been craving. For one - he's been craving McDonald's Fries - another Ice Cream and then we got into discussions on cakes! For me ...I was wanting anything but Structure House food. I've been battling with my inner rebel - and today I decided that enough was enough - and that I needed to just commit to going out and having something.

As I was driving around I was thinking about what I felt like ... I decided that if I saw a Wendy's . . . then that is what I would have. Wouldn't you know it - as soon as I made the decision - in minutes a sign appeared on my left to notify me that there was a Wendy's at the next traffic light - traffic opened up and I had a clear path direct to Wendy's! I pulled up, parked and in I went. I had my favorite - a single with cheese, lettuce + mayo, small fries and a diet coke - 770 calories! The chap at the counter handed me my tray and the fries were pale and looked disgusting - I figured that if I was going to off structure -then they better be good - so asked if they could be cooked more (he said oh ...you want them to be crispy ..."Yes, please!" I quickly replied).

I savored each bite - it tasted yummy and was surprised to find that I was feeling full and was unable to eat all of my crispy fries. I didn't really notice how salty it was when I was eating ...but am certainly noticing it now - hours after the deed - I feel as if I have been drinking salt water! YEECHHHH!! Generally ...feel a little sluggish. So ...as much as I enjoyed doing something unstructured - I'm going to have to definitely find a better way to satiate the urge as the after effects of Wendy's make it clear to me that it's just not worth it!

Tomorrow is another day - we'll see how much of a toll this will have on my weekly total - all will be revealed when I update the gift ticker tomorrow!

Here's to a great week for us all!

Lots of love,

Norma

Learning to listen to my body

This is the 4th week of the Structure House program - and technically once this week is completed you're considered a graduate. Most leave after the month and some opt to remain. For those that are leaving, they undergo the same tests that we took when we first arrived. I wanted to get an idea of how successful I have been so far, so asked if I could do the fitness test - I'll wait and do the blood work in my last week here.

I have worked hard - and was pleased to discover that my fitness levels have improved significantly. My first week here, I was at the absolute bottom of the charts - the only thing that came close to average was my grip, everything else was poor or at the bottom of the grid - with most at the bottom. After four weeks I am thrilled to report that my range is now mainly hitting the average mark and a few things hovering just above below average. My BMI is still high - but physically I'm doing so much better that my BMI will continue to improve over time.

The nurse also took my measurements and my chest, waist and hips now total 8" smaller than when I arrived! I was blown away with this - as I had commented on the weekend that the only real difference that I had noticed was that my rings were getting loose on my fingers. Wearing primarily exercise clothes, it's hard to notice a real difference right now.

I'm really enjoying the fitness classes that are influenced by dance. I find that I get a great cardio workout - my spirit loves them - and I am discovering that on the days that I dance - I am on a real high. The same is true when I do the strength training workouts. I realised last week that I was holding back - and decided it was time to work with one of the personal trainers. I really enjoy working with him - he challenges me to do more - at a pace that works for me. He also ensures that I stretch between sets - which really helps.

I have try to stretch daily - and I truly believe that this is helping to improve my muscle tone and has eliminated any stiffness that I might experience from all the physical activities that I have been doing.

I have been slowly working my way through all of the classes offered -and am finding that I really don't enjoy the aerobics classes as much as I did 18 - 20 years ago. I did a step aerobic class today - and found it to be brutal. I don't think it helped that my body was tired today - I did not have it in my schedule but opted to do it as I had missed the earlier dynaband class. I got through the class, but it was a struggle. There were several times when I wanted to quit and leave - but I was determined to complete the class. Later when I met with Randy for my strength training work out - he told me that it was important that I make time to nap or sleep in order to allow my body to fully recover. No need to get injured now!

So, rather than go to chair yoga or cardio ballroom - I decided to return to my apartment and put my feet up for the hour before dinner. After dinner I went for a swim and did some stretching in the water. It was my first swim since I've been here - it felt good to be in the water. I had intended to go to the outdoor pool but got as far as my foot - the water was just too cold! So ...I went to the indoor pool - I'm not a big fan of the indoor pool - as it has a strong chlorine smell about it ....but it was warmer. I did a few laps and essentially played in the water (it helped that I had the pool to myself!).

As I played around in the water - I realised how important it was for me to listen to my body and my heart. I am learning to do that here, actually I've been working on this for a while now - but am now putting it into practice for myself.

I've noticed a real difference since I started doing the movement expression with Rebecca. She has this ability of creating a safe environment so much so that I am able to play with the music as I dance. Yesterday we worked together in the gym as the smaller space was already booked. Her instruction was to start from my toes and to let them dance - and gradually work my way up through the rest of my body - and then to use the all of the space in the gym. It was an uplifting experience as I tried new moves and relaxed into the music.

We also worked more on the acapella piece "We Are". For a few seconds I became aware that others were watching and I started to get self-conscious. I chose to acknowledge the feeling and let it go - and continued with my dance. When we finished, I felt terrific - I was dripping with sweat - but was exhilarated!

When I went outside after my class, I had a few people compliment me on how I moved. It's funny - I find it much easier to give compliments than to receive them. And yesterday was initially no different - I heard my inner gremlin jump up in my brain and immediately dismiss what was being said - and after the second instance - another thought popped up .... instead of dismissing the compliment outright, why not accept it gracefully. My inner critic or gremlin was quite willing to accept this - and all was good in my world :-).

I'm getting there - one day at a time! Tomorrow is NIA :-))) and my third session with Rebecca :-)). It's also movie night ...so a night out off campus (woohoo!!!).

Time for me to head to bed!

Lots of love,

Norma

Letting Go & Having Fun!

Wow! These last two days have been incredible! I wanted to update everyone last night, but was exhausted from a very physical day. It started in the morning with low impact aerobics class before lunch. After lunch, I had my first one-to-one movement (dance) class with Rebecca that was immediately followed by a dance fusion (Jazz + Latin) class, an hour break and then Gyrokinesis. I had to make a run to Target after dinner - and by the time I returned to the apartment, I was ready for bed!

I logged on to update the gift ticker - but that was about all I could do - my bed was calling. For the first time in a long time, I was in bed by 10 PM - which for me is exceptionally early. My private class with Rebecca was great - she created a sign for the door to welcome me. I showed her the two pictures I had created and then we were off and running. She showed me some moves an had a song for me that incorporated the movements she had taught me. She encouraged me to improvise and create my own moves. It was a liberating experience - at times I felt truly connected to the music and felt myself fully in-sync with the music. There were also moments when I felt a little self-conscious - Rebecca is very supportive and encouraging - and so I continued. We meet up again tomorrow :-).

Oh...before I forget - the music she choose is an acapella piece titled "We Are" performed by Faith In Action . The piece was originally done by Sweet Honey on The Rock - which brought back memories of years gone by when they were in Bermuda and the female acapella group led by Pat Nesbitt (Pogson).

Today I did Chair Karate class as well as personal training session on Strength Training. Randy threw in some new moves that focused on my upper body and we completed the circuit on the machines. It was an excellent work-out - hard work though ...I was sweating up a storm! I missed the regular self defense (karate class) as I was on the phone with my sweetie. The call was important and after all the cardio I did yesterday - I was OK with missing the extra hour.

Tonight was our group's opportunity to eat out. We went to the Rockfish Seafood Grill. We had to review the menu in advance and select healthy choices. We were lucky as there were a number of options to choose from - they have a 'Body and Sole" menu which provides calorie, fat, fiber and protein per item. The food was yummy and I'm fairly certain that everyone had a great time. Unfortunately, one of our group members had to leave yesterday to return home for surgery - so we were shy one person. We all missed her - as we've also agreed to go for our white belt in NIA together ...so know that we will continue to keep in touch.

Tomorrow will be another full day of cardio - starting with NIA in the morning, dance with Rebecca, Pilates on the Ball and Gyrokinesis! I am going to try and book a massage for the evening as I suspect that my body will appreciate it.

That's it for now!

Lots of love,

Norma

Wow ...it's week 4 already!

When I arrived four Sunday's ago - I remember feeling a bit apprehensive about what lay before me. Having now completed three weeks here - I can actually say that I am feeling pretty good. I recognise that I'm carrying a lot of extra weight, but am beginning to move better than I have in a long time.

On Friday evening the group that was getting ready to "graduate" held a dance in the gym - they put a lot of effort into it - they created music CD's with music of today and yesteryear's. They even decorated the gym with disco banners! It was great fun and I danced up a storm :-). I had fun dancing and acting up to the music like I used to do years ago. Granted I wasn't able to shake all the way down to the ground ...but I did manage to make it halfway! The next morning when I walked into the dining room - I received all sorts of compliments about my dance moves :-) Guess I still got it (hehehehe).

I had a great work out on Saturday - with an hour on the treadmill and then my strength training workout. I incorporated all of the changes, including the stretches, that the personal trainer gave me when we worked together on Thursday. I got really excited, because one of the stretches involves putting my leg up on the bench and bending forward to grasp my foot to pull it towards me. A few weeks ago, I could not get anywhere near my foot - on Thursday, I was close - but not there completely ....and on Saturday - I was actually able to grab the top of my sneaker and bring it towards me. WOOHOO!!!!

I accidentally missed breakfast this morning and discovered that when you're on a fixed calorie day, missing a meal is not good! By the time lunch came, I was starving. Lunch was tasty but, without the buffer of breakfast, it didn't quite fill the void.

After lunch two of us headed to a NIA class off campus. It was a great class, I was a little apprehensive about going to a regular class off campus - and discovered that I was able to keep up with the class. Looking around the room, there were women of all ages and it was absolutely wonderful. My friend and I have decided that we will work towards attaining our white belt in NIA later this year. It's something that I want to keep on doing after I leave here - so want to get good enough that I can do it on my own and perhaps one day introduce it to Bermuda.

Today was certainly a test regarding food cravings for our group - we've all been very good since we arrived - dinner tonight was OK - but I found that the void of missing breakfast was taking it's toll. I ate my dinner slowly - with the hope that I could trick my stomach into feeling full .... but found that I was still hungry. It's also our week to dine off campus - and to prepare we have to review the restaurant's menu and make healthy choices in advance.

Looking at restaurant menus when you're hungry is perhaps not the smartest thing to do. All that appealed to me was the appetizers and desserts! Before you know it, someone had their iPhone out and was searching for the closest Dairy Queen (7.25 miles away)! We were all salivating and finding creative ways to justify heading out - when as if from nowhere the head of the dining room came by to ask how things were going. I explained that I was still hungry as I had missed breakfast and that we were contemplating heading off campus. He offered to give me a banana and some cereal - the entire table turned their attention to me ...and while a bowl of raisin bran did not have the same appeal as a DQ Peanut Buster Parfait or the new waffle bowl hot fudge brownie sundae (they keep advertising)- I opted for the cereal. :-)

Tonight I sat down to do the "homework" that I was assigned from by Rebecca (my Gyrokinesis teacher). We're gong to do some work that centers around movement and music. I'm not quite sure what it entails -our first session is tomorrow after lunch. She asked me to do something on what letting go would look like. When she told me, I asked if it had to be in writing or could I do art. She confirmed that I could use any medium that I wanted to express myself - so I opted to use the art kit that Katrine got me. (thanks sweetie :-)) I created two pictures - I'm not sure what she'll do with it - so am very curious about tomorrow.

I'll update the gift tracker tomorrow - I'm still taking baby steps towards achieving my goal - whether I am able to provide Structure House with the full donation before I leave is debatable. I have pledged the first 50 pounds to Structure House and I'll honor my pledge even if it is completed after I leave. Then I'll have to start thinking about where I'll donate my next 50 pounds!

When I first started doing this, I didn't know what it would be like to write about my experience in a public forum. I am discovering that expressing my thoughts in this forum helps me to keep focused as well as provide a means to keep in touch with friends and family. I enjoy hearing from everyone and hearing about what's happening in your lives.

It helps me to remember that I have a lot to be thankful for! Here's to a great week everyone! :-)

Lots of love,

Norma

Drawing Analogies

These last two days have been interesting ones -yesterday was a great cardio day with a NIA class in the morning, gyrokinesis in the afternoon and volleyball in the evening. I finished off the day with a massage - and was ready to collapse into bed last night.

I woke at 6 this morning with the realisation that I had not submitted my menu for next week yesterday. I had completed the hard copy on Monday -but had not made the time to do it online. I prefer to submit it electronically - as they will provide us with a hard copy for our own records. If you hand it the hard copy - you don't get a copy back - so meals become a bit of a surprise and runs afoul of the Structure House way!

One of the lectures today was on Food and Eating in Relationships. One of the things that I have realised since being here is that although the choices I have made this past year have not been the best - the relationship that I struggle with is work related. When asked about options re: food - I find that for the most part I don't have the same struggles that others may have - however, if I approach the very same question posed from a work perspective - my level of comfort disappears.

It's funny, I've had people describe me as a workaholic - and I have never been willing to admit that this was me and could easily point to others that worked harder than me. I know I worked hard - I was a little surprised when one of these individuals was quick to tell me that my relationship with work was like an addict - that I was addicted to work. I admit, I like to be busy - but am coming to realise that this need to be busy all the time is not healthy - especially when I use it to avoid taking care of myself.

In class when they talk about options - it all seems rather straight forward, almost easy at times. Putting it into practice will be the real test. It's one of the reasons why we are encouraged to create a plan now. I know I have some time before I am scheduled to return and a little nervous as to whether I will succeed. This nervousness is telling me that this is something I need to tackle - and now is the time to do it.

I've booked some time with two of the personal trainers. I am feeling a lot stronger physically than I was - but after playing volleyball outside on the long grass last night, I realised that I have a ways to go! It was hard work - it was interesting as the the younger folks were much more willing to throw themselves after the ball - and the rest of us older ones were willing to let it pass us by. I found playing on the long grass a challenge and exhausting - it is much easier indoors!

Today I had my first session with Randy on the strength training machines. I was pleased to hear that for the most part my form is good - there was only one machine that I needed to adjust my posture. What I did discover was that I am able to do more with the weight machines than I anticipated - so today we adjusted all but one. The great thing about working with a personal trainer is that he makes me stretch between sets (I tend to wait until the next day) and is showing me stretches that I can manage on my own. He threw in a couple of extra variations or super combos to improve my workout and removed one of the exercises that I was doing as it was one where there was a high risk of injury associated with it. My goal is to work with Randy to develop a training program that I can use when I return home.

The other trainer that I am going to have some individual sessions is my gyrokinesis teacher - she has a degree in dance - so we will work together on movement. I am not quite sure as to what it involves, but it sounds exciting as it involves movement, music - and homework! I wasn't expecting the latter ....but it's one that can be done in writing or through art. I've opted for art - and am looking forward to playing with the set that Katrine gave me before coming.

Well that's it for now! Happy Friday everyone!

Love,

Norma

Healing comes in many forms

It's late and technically I should be in bed already -but felt the need to write about the day.

It was a full day - it started with nutrition classes and ended with the Supermarket Scavenger Hunt. As luck would have it - I ended up on a great team and we won! Thankfully two of members have attended all lectures and did the supermarket sleuth tour already. Each team were handed a series of riddles and we had to unravel the clue and then find the correct item. We were given one clue at a time and it was a race to the finish. Once out selection was confirmed correct we were given our next clue. We did this during shopping hours - and were told that we needed to be considerate of the shoppers. Ultimately we're a competitive bunch - and as we were racing to locate our final clue, I found myself stuck behind a slow moving member of the opposing team and a shopper. For a brief second I contemplated bulldozing my way between them - but had a quick vision of being escorted out and opted to walk down the aisle and cut across the center instead. :-)

I had my second self defense class today - and did much better than last week. I think it helped that I went to chair karate as well last week as it helped me to get a better feel of the moves. We also had NIA today -it's amazing, each class is different and a lot of fun.

I am finding that I gravitate to the classes that have an element of healing in them. Gyrokinesis and NIA both were founded by people that used movement as a means to heal. I enjoy the self defense classes as it too promotes wellness as well a means to defend and protect ourselves. Both NIA and the self defense classes also incorporate vocalizations - I am finding that there is something powerful about yelling KIA or NO or YES.

Tonight I watched a film with a friend "Finding Angela Shelton" - http://www.findingangelashelton.com it's about a woman who goes across the US and meets women with the same name. A journey which unveils some fascinating statistics and highlights how many women are affected by abuse. It stirred up some memories for both of us - and provided us with an opportunity to share and develop some understanding of ourselves.

I realised shortly before coming to Structure House -that when things get tough for me I turn to work as a means of escape from what ever it is that I am avoiding. I am realising that over the years that every time I have a crisis of sorts in my personal life - I sought solace at work. Work is a constant - it's always there and there is always something that needed to be done. It is easy to focus on the "stuff" at work - and could always justify it taking precedent over everything else.

Although I felt that I had some sense of control at work, I am realising that I had allowed my life to get out of control, was continuously choosing to eat unhealthy food and doing very little for myself. I think I had given up and was secretly waiting for something to happen - I'm not exactly sure as to what I was hoping for - and am very thankful that I woke up and took action before anything serious had manifested.

This break is giving me an opportunity to institute positive changes in my life. There are some people here that have lost a lot of weight, some have been here for 6 months, some return annually, for others it was 5 years ago. All have different yet similar stories, sometimes I wonder what my story will look like five or even ten years from now - and while I have a vision of what I would like it to be, it is more important that I focus on today, living in the moment and cherishing each positive thing that I do for myself creates a pathway for me to be more fully engaged in life and the world at large.

I'm learning that healing comes in many ways by letting go of the "stuff" that I have carried for years I am discovering new ways to heal and grow. It's an exciting time of my life, one that I am truly thankful for.

Thanks for listening (reading) and your continued support, I really appreciate it!

Lots of love,

Norma

It's Monday & time for the Nutrition Bowl

This is the first week where my group doesn’t have a lot of lectures. We had a whole host of new arrivals on Sunday – so campus is busy. Add Nutrition Week to the mix – and it is pandemonium! Although the list of lectures for our group is short - the Nutrition Week organizers would have us attend every single nutrition class on the agenda. They've created a score card and the person who accumulates the most points will win a prize at the end of the week.

Today was the big Nutrition Bowl - extra points were up for grabs if you came in a costume - and it was truly amazing to see how creative some people were. As "Vanna White" I transformed my bathing suit and sarong into a faux evening gown. One group was extremely creative and created theme costumes around nutrition and came armed with water pistols - another created an elaborate headgear out of balloons, some came in grass skirts - one made a hat out of cabbage + a sandwich board talking about it's two main strengths. The competition was fierce, the questions seemed to be never ending - but after an hour we had a clear winner.

I thought that as Vanna White, I would have it easy ...not thinking that I would be on my feet the entire time - with no letters to turn, I was charged with posting the points for each correct answer and modeled the exciting prizes. As score keeper – I took the liberty of deducting points from those that squirted me – and as the competition was fierce it was a good way to avoid getting drenched! Marlene (the Director of Nutrition) posed the questions and Nancy, our fearless nutrition intern was the time keeper. We had two teams - one for the newbies/ first timers and the other for the returnees. It was good fun.

Tomorrow night is the Supermarket Scavenger Hunt - I signed up out of curiosity - we shall see! If today’s questions are any indication as to what it entails …it won’t be easy. I’m hoping that I’ll get teamed up with someone who is very knowledgeable.

All in all it's been a busy day - I started off the morning with the low impact aerobics class - it's a level 2/3 class - and discovered that doing the lateral moves was a real challenge - the top part of my outer thighs / hips screamed in pain -so had to make some adjustments. I think all the dance classes are catching up - and I need to do more stretching. Thankfully, there was a Gyrokinesis class this afternoon -and that's a great one to stretch some of the sore muscles. I managed to persuade a few others to join in as well. I finished off with strength training on the weight machines. I have been avoiding doing crunches (primarily because I can't stand them) but bit the bullet and am pleased to report that today, I did 3 sets of 10 on the ball. I figured it was time - and that as long as I avoided them - the more challenging they would be - so will add them to the end of my strength training routine.

After dinner, I went to cooking demo on Chinese food. It’s hosted by this lady from China and is at her store. She’s been doing this with Structure House for 20 years and was excellent. She had several tips on ways to convert it from fattening to low fat and healthy. We did Shrimp Fried Rice (Cantonese Style) - which soon became Szechuan Style (guess who asked??? :-)) General Tso's Chicken and Peking Dumpling Soup. The amazing thing is - that other than a few squirts of oil for the rice - no other oil was used! It was very tasty - and easy to do - so will definitely be able to do it at home.

Well -I've going to end it here - as we have another full day tomorrow - and ....an extra NIA class - so need to get a good night's rest!

I hear that the heavy rains have caused a lot of flooding in Bermuda - I'm hoping that all is dry at my apartment - and that those that have been impacted by the adverse weather will have respite soon!

Love to all!

Norma

Heading into week 3 :-)

In some ways it's hard to believe that I'm about to embark on my third week here at Structure House. The nutrition team have been busy organizing activities to celebrate Nutrition Week - highlights include a Nutrition Bowl Game Show, What Color is your Diet, Virtual Tour of Whole Foods Market and a Supermarket Scavenger Hunt. We've been promised prizes ....although as they have yet actually identify an actual prize, I'm a little dubious.

In any case, I've signed up for the Game Show as Vanna White ....and discovered tonight that I'm to show up in a costume!!! So will have to get my creative juices in gear ...as I don't really have anything that remotely resembles something that she would wear! I also signed up for the cooking demo - it's Chinese and I am told that the lady who does it is very good.

We had a special cooking demo yesterday to honor Mother's Day. Our nutrition intern made blueberry muffins and fruit smoothies (all low fat / low calories) the muffins were yummy - I like smoothies but adding peanut butter to it ruined it for me ...I like peanut butter and have missed not having it on my toast ...but can't imagine ever acquiring a taste to drinking it!

I discovered that they have a rotation of nutrition students that come here to do internships - so Mel ...if you need to do an internship for your course - this may be something to consider. I told them that you were very creative with your recipes :-)

The weekend has been relatively quiet. I had a great workout yesterday - I repeated my stint on the treadmill at the higher level - it is a challenge still but it went easier than the last time I did it. I then moved on to the weight machines. I work out on my own and pick up tips from the personal trainer as he works with one of the other participants. I helped encourage one of the other participants on the weight machines yesterday morning - there was a mix up on appointments and he was going to not work out ...so I offered to work with him. He's starting out and was a bit apprehensive and was really psyched when he completed all of the exercises on his sheet.

Sunday is officially my exercise free day - it was funny - I woke up this morning and felt like working out! One of the other groups organized a little party in the gym tonight - so I went and played badminton and a game of toss (with the giant balls and volleyball). I haven't played badminton in a while and was pleased to discover that I could still play. I also discovered that my inner competitor is alive and well ...and had to work hard to just rally and not go for the killer smash! All in all it was good fun and a nice way to finish the weekend.

I'll update my gift tracker after tomorrow's weigh in - I am a little disappointed that the number will not be as significant as last week - but that's fine - the fact that I am physically feeling much better than I have in a long time, that I am looking forward to next weeks fitness classes and workouts reflects that I am progressing nicely :-))

Lots of love!

Norma

What is success?

I've found myself pondering this today. I woke up this morning and realised it was Friday already. The week has passed quickly - it seems like the weekend was only yesterday and here it is again!

Although the week has passed by quickly - it's been much harder than my first week. Last week, it seemed like the pounds just slid off - this week they've been holding on for dear life! Normally, I ignore the scale altogether - avoidance obviously doesn't work. I don't think obsessing over it does either. So ...will have to find a way to make it my friend. Here - being "structured" means getting on the scale every morning before breakfast. In the lectures, we are told that this daily ritual helps us to keep structured and that we should not obsess about the scale. What can I say.... it's something that is much easier to say than to do!

On the fitness side of things - I have done well. I tried a couple of new classes and successfully managed to complete an entire program at a level higher than last week on the treadmill. I am discovering that I am stronger than I thought and that pushing it up a level and sticking to it - can be very rewarding.

It bothers me that I am allowing the scale to frustrate me - I am determined to meet my goal and am a little demoralized that things aren't moving as fast as I want. Realistically - it is not reasonable or healthy to expect the same results week after week. Studies show that 1 to 2 pounds a week is healthy and practical. I know this ...yet I still let it get to me ...(arghh!!!)

Physically, I feel and look better than I did when I arrived. I've been receiving compliments from other participants and staff about the transition in this short time - so know that I am on the right track. The competitor in me wants to be on the fast or turbo track - my logical side reminds me that I'm in the process of switching tracks - the one that I was on was a long, sluggish train that was wearing itself down.

In one of our lectures today - they talked of an investment banker in London, who has completely transformed his life over the last 2 years - he was working crazy hours, had stopped exercising and was lost control of his eating. Over the past 2 years he's dropped 115 lbs and created a more balanced life that works for him. Mathematically that translates to an average of 5 lbs a month - wow ...I can do that :-)))

To answer my own question- success right now -is making the most out of every day - increasing my stamina and flexibility and most importantly being present in the moment!

Lots of love,

Norma

NIA-phoric :-)

Now ...what is NIA-phoric you say .... well it's a phrase coined by on of our group members after participating in our very first NIA class last Wednesday. Our group is so enthusiastic about it, that we convinced the fitness director to add on an additional class. The class is now offered twice a week and has become one of the most popular classes. The class has tripled in size since last week. It's really special to see everyone get into the spirit, let loose, have a great time and break into a sweat! Our teacher Kate is brilliant (see the links on the side for information about NIA and her website).

We have created such a buzz around the campus about NIA - it's great. One of the leavers last week was so enthralled by it, that she's decided to become an instructor. I don't know if NIA is offered in Bermuda - but I am certainly hoping that if it is not -that it will be offered soon. It's such a fun class!

Today - NIA was exactly what I needed - I was not feeling that motivated to work out today - my energy level was a little low, so I skipped the lecture on Supermarket Sleuths - chilled for a bit -and then headed to NIA. After an hour of movement, dance, vocalizations and glee - I was ready to roll through the rest of the day.

Which was a good thing as I finally met the great Dr. Musante (the founder of Structure House) and even managed to challenge an analogy that he offered in response to a question in the weekly Q&A that he does for all the participants on "Staying Structured". After lunch, we had another class on menu planning - I will master portions and the food pyramid before too long. The head of Nutrition is organizing a Game Show quiz extravaganza for next week - I asked if I could dial a friend (figuring that I'd call Mel for assistance) and she said no :-(. I offered to play the Vanna White character - I figure that will be much easier than pushing buttons to respond to nutrition questions. There are some here that are very knowledgeable - I'm trying to get my own breakdown straight first.

I headed to the gym for my strength training workout with the machines after dinner tonight. There was a group that were gearing up to play poker - and another that were heading out to go shopping. As I had not done my strength training workout for the day - I passed :-)) The gym was pretty quiet which was nice. I missed my work out buddy tonight - as he opted to walk the Structure House trails instead.

Ironically - there are a number people here that have been to or have a close connection with Bermuda - a few where there earlier this year, one lady arrived this week after spending the month of March in Bermuda. She took up painting after she retired - she's working on a few paintings from her visit and was so excited to hear that I was from Bermuda. Another has planned a family cruise to come to the island this October. Yet another, is the sister-in-law of the Premier - a very nice lady. One of the returnees remembers meeting a Bermudian lady that usually comes in the fall for a month - she apparently comes a couple of times a year.

So, although it can feel like I'm alone at times -I truly don't have to venture very far to have a reminder of home. I really appreciate your support and encouragement - it keeps me going, especially on those days when I don't feel as motivated as I could be.

Lots of love,

Norma

Eating Out Smart

That was the title of our first lecture this morning - this week's focus was on the American chains - we get part two - ethnic cuisine next week. It was nice to see that many of the chains are now offering healthier selections - it was a bit of a shock to see the caloric count of some of my favorites! At this point, I can't imagine never eating any of them again - but realise now -that even when I reach my optimal weight - I can no longer eat like I have been this last little while!

I met with the nutritionist this afternoon for my one on one session - our focus today was on creating a plan for my return home. It seemed so soon ... especially when you think that I'm only in my second week - but it's important to prepare now as this will give me time to ingrain it into my psyche.

I tried a couple of new classes today - Self-defense and chair karate - I enjoyed the self defense class - the chair karate class was a bit slow - but it did give me an opportunity to work on the arm movements. I found that I was OK when doing it in slow motion ...but when it came to the faster clips ....I would get arm-tied! So much so ...that my instructor had to leap out of the way a few times as my punch headed towards his jaw or his eye! I finished off the day with the treadmill - I'm determined to move up a level on the program that I'm doing - as I'd like to get out on the trails. I won't get there this week - but am hopeful that I'll do so next week.

The days so far have been pretty full - the lecture schedule is beginning to ease up - which will free up my schedule a bit. I haven't had a chance to read any of the books that I brought and am only starting to respond to your emails. I haven't yet figured out how to respond to the comments posted on the blog direct - so will respond via gmail until I figure it out.

It really means a lot to know that I have so many willing to share this dance with me.

Lots of love,

Norma

Getting ready for week TWO

I opted to treat Sunday as a day of rest. After 6 days of working out - I was feeling the need to take it easy. It was nice to talk with both Katrine & Tish on Sunday and Mom tonight.

Our whole group ventured out to one of the local fitness stores to pick up new sneakers. I found that my feet were craving a switch from wearing the same pair of sneakers every day. When I put on a new pair - it was like they jumped for joy! The rest of the group are coffee addicts - so we hit Starbucks on the way back - I opted for water - and bypassed the baked goodies that looked very yummy.

By Sunday evening the euphoria of completing my first week began to fade as I contemplated another week full of classes and working out. I made great progress this past week and made great strides towards achieving my goal - (see tracker above :-)) I realise that much of this is because of the fact that I was 100 times more physical than I have been for the past year. I recognise that as my body adjusts to being physically active that things will slow down a bit. I went to bed, resolved not to let it get me down.

My gremlin was up bright and early this morning ready to remind me that I had a full day ahead. I pushed on and added 10 mins to my treadmill work out and agreed to meet up with Tim at 3 to work out on the weight machines. I was quite chuffed when I completed the entire route on the treadmill in good spirits and headed off to my first lecture of the day. I wasn't expecting to get the results of our fitness test - and ...well.. when I saw my report...I found it to be a little demoralizing- I knew that I had let myself go this last few years - but seeing the results in black and white was a hard pill to swallow.

We had lunch immediately afterwards and I soon discovered that none of us were thrilled with our results - it was good to share how we felt. I then went to a fabulous class - Gyrokinesis - http://www.gyrotonic.com/Gyrokinesis.asp it was exactly what I needed today! I left the class in much better spirits and headed to our next lecture - on weight loss goals. It was a good class and put things into perspective.

I am thankful that I have connected with a few people here - this, coupled with the support of friends and family from all over. I realised today that I have a long way to go - and that the 50 lbs that I plan to gift Structure House is only the start. I didn't get here overnight and know that it will be a few years before I truly reach my "optimal healthy weight".

Until then, I will continue to dance, move, play and just be the best that I can one step at a time and take each day as it comes!

Lots of love,

Norma

It's the weekend!

In some respects, it is hard to believe that the weekend is here - it has been a good week, my body is tired from a week full of physical exertion.

Friday was a full day with lectures most of the day. The highlight was that we managed to have an extra NIA class scheduled in the afternoon. It's such a fun class - it's very energizing and a great work out - as one of my group members put it ...we were all "NIA-Phoric" after class. It made the last few lectures of the day manageable as we were all very in high spirits. So much so - that I even decided to join the last class of the day - Yoga - it was supposed to have been an intermediate class - but as the majority had never done Yoga, it ended up being a Yoga-stretch class.

While I can see the benefits of Yoga ....it was definitely one where I was acutely aware of how much flexibility I have lost over the years. The teacher was very nice -and provided us with some extra equipment to assist. I am very thankful for the bolster cushions (for the fanny) and long straps (help increase the length of the arms for those moments when you are to grab your feet) ...the verdict - one that I will try again as the stretching aspect was beneficial and much needed. For the long term .... I strongly suspect not! (Sorry Mel & Katrine - I know you both enjoy Yoga).

The food took a turn for the worse last night...I struggled - the chicken arrived in a bowl in a broth with veggies ...my heart sank - it was so pale and it didn't seem that anything I added to it could improve the flavor. I tried ...but could not eat it - and gave up in frustration. I had signed up for the movies - so I announced that I was going to have popcorn.

So off to the movies I went .... I bought a small bag of popcorn (no chocolate) with a small diet coke. I didn't make it through the whole bag ...actually didn't even get through half of it. On it's own ...it was salty - and just not the same with chocolate. Going to the movies was a nice treat - but it reminded me of how much I miss going to the movies with Tish in England or Katrine (& Mom) in Bermuda. I don't think it helped that it was a romantic comedy ....not the best one to see on your own!

The weekends here are fairly quiet -there are only two exercise classes offered on Saturday and none on Sunday. I opted to do one of the pre-set programs on the treadmill (hills) for 30 minutes and the weight machines. It was a great workout - so much so that when I went to lunch (after shower and all cleaned up) one of the women at the table asked if I had make up on ....I was glowing :-)

Speaking of which - it's time for me to hit the hay ....8:00 a.m. will be here before I know it!

Lots of love,

Norma

A Star is Born :-)

The Million Step March came to Structure House today - along with the local paper and TV crews. Gary Marino and Kathy Higgins are walking criss-cross through North Carolina giving talks and encouraging people to walk. Gary first started his march several years ago - at that time he was 35 and weighed 397 lbs - he had high cholesterol and hypertension -and decided to make a change - at his size the only thing that was available to him was to walk - he started walking in his neighborhood - and has he got into shape - decided to walk from Florida to Boston, Mass (his home town) to raise awareness and encourage others. Since then he completed the Boston marathon and made various walks to raise awareness.

I decided to skip my scheduled lecture on antecedents (triggers) and attend the talk. The reporter from the newspaper sat down beside me and asked if it was OK to ask me a few questions. I said sure ...not really thinking of what I was getting into. I soon discovered that following the presentation we were all scheduled to walk a 2.8 mile walk with Gary and the crew along the Structure House trail. Not one to say no .. or to shirk a challenge ...I found myself walking along the trail. I didn't realise that it was as hilly as it was ...and as they are not my favorites - I was breathing heavy at the top of the route. When they continued onto the road - I decided that it was time for me to turn around - so started my return back to Structure House.

Just as we got to the top of the hill at Structure House - the other woman that I was walking with, realised that the group were returning behind us. As we returned, the television crew came up and asked if they could ask me a few questions. So ...I said yes :-) I ended up talking with Gary Marino again and he gave me a copy of his book - so I came away with a whole pile of goodies, the bracelet, pedometer and t-shirt!

Then headed to my cardio ballroom class. I enjoyed dancing - it was hard work though - ballroom dancing - really works the hips ....we were sweating up a storm. Our teacher was very excited with our group and kept introducing new steps and movements. Those that attended last week - said that this weeks class was much more livelier. All I can say is that we were all sweating up a storm!

I did well with the fitness test this morning - it's only been a few days - but am already noticing that I'm feeling much stronger physically and am adjusting well to the diet.

The food is not that bad. There are some things that are certainly much tastier than others. I like that we get to select our own menus for the week. The first 48 hours - you're stuck with more or less what they give you - but they will allow you to make changes. We are required to hand in our week's selections on Wednesday. They provide you with a skeleton that reflects your total calorie entitlement for the week. You then have the choice to accept everything as is or make changes.

I made oodles of changes - eliminating the foods that I truly cannot stand and combining things that I do like. The ingredients are all fresh - if anything is not -they let you know. Most things are baked, steamed - some may start off on the grill and then thrown in the oven. Nothing is fried, no salt is used - the primary seasoning is various herbs.

Dessert is practically non-existent - unless you count applesauce or plain yogurt. I'm not a fan - so will usually swap it out for fresh fruit :-). Armed with hot sauce, black pepper and herbs - I'm usually able to adjust the taste to something that I can enjoy. Our lone gentlemen opted to not make any changes and has discovered that he really can't stand cottage cheese (no matter what you do to it!) he bit the bullet last night and adjusted his menu - he announced this morning at breakfast that all traces of cottage cheese have been eliminated!

I tried lactaid skim milk today for the first time - and was pleased to discover that I can add this to my cereal and not get the same sour - icky / queasy reaction that I get when I have regular milk. I don't know why I have never tried lactaid before ...now that I have ... I will have more choices with breakfast ...all in all - a good day :)

Well ...it's getting later ..and I'm tired - so will bid all a goodnight :-)

Thanks again for the words of encouragement and continued support :-)

Lots of love,

Norma